The comp.sys.sinclair Crap Games Competition 2021 - 25th edition!



  28 February 2021: Kerl wasn't half busy making Crap Games in the final two months of 2020, and hasn't finished yet. For those that like their games utterly frustrating, Horace and the Vikings will throw you into a deep, dark hole. You won't be singing along to Mellom bakkar og berg after this one!
  26 February 2021: It's a first for the CSSCGC: multiple QL entries! Never before in 25 years of this competition has the Black Box with the microdrives received so much attention. Steve Poole's Invaders will give you a taste of what games programming was like for those who received their QLs on time in early 1984, with the dongle hanging out the back.
  24 February 2021: What do you do if it's 1983, but your miserable car-washing job doesn't pay enough to stretch to buying a copy of 3D Deathchase? 38 years too late, Rob Edwards has the perfect solution, provided your Spectrum is a 48K model: 2D Deathchase! Also, Shower Simulator has had a version added for the 48K Spectrum.
  21 February 2021: A South American Crap Game Grudge Match has been declared as Darío Ruellan, from Argentina, enters the competition for a third year in a row, to tackle on Brazil's Alexandre Colella head-on. Wearing the sky-blue-and-white stripes is Shower Simulator, for the 16K Spectrum.
  19 February 2021: Add another machine to the list! None other than "Mr QL" himself, Dilwyn Jones, has sent Don't Shoot the QL, which even had a bit of beta-testing courtesy of some members of the QL Forum. I wonder what computer might be used to run it? (Hint: it isn't a Spectrum, but it does come equipped with two microdrives.)
  14 February 2021: Jamie Bradbury has certainly been busy - his second entry is Blind Snake Moan for the 48K Spectrum, a novel take on the Snake concept, in that your snake is blind. I was going to say "play it and see", but that sounds wrong...
  7 February 2021: Battle From Below has been updated to version 1.3 with three extra screens. The ZIP package contains both this and the old version 1.2 which was used for the review.
  6 February 2021: Jamie Bradbury is using the CSSCGC as a test bed for Battle From Below for the 48K Spectrum, which might grow into something bigger and better if the feedback is good. As it is, it's a two-player "charity single" for a friend in need.
  3 February 2021: Possibly in retaliation for me sending Crap Games for all sorts of weird and wonderful machines to his 2020 competition, John Connolly has submitted an entry... for the Jupiter Ace! Genesis 1:28 is "a painfully unfunny extrapolation" (in John's words) of the words most usually associated with that Bible verse.
  31 January 2021: Crikey! Only one day later, "Hedge1970" has sent Mono-Rail Simulator, "a 1982/3-style type-in game" for the 48K Spectrum. At 28.6K that'd be a lot of typing! Fortunately, the game justifies the length, and you don't have to type it in anyway. Control your own railway in glorious Spectrum ROM characters! (And a couple of UDGs.)
  30 January 2021: Steve McCrea, a.k.a. Kweepa, has sent Cretans, a minimalist maze game for the 16K Spectrum which might well have graced the pages of Sinclair Programs in the second half of 1982. Also, the final results have been declared in John Connolly's 2020 CSSCGC, so if you want to know exactly how I came to be this year's host, you'll see the answer there. The Past Competitions page has been updated accordingly.
  21 January 2021: ASMR Eye Examination has been updated with a "v1.1" bug-fixed version, which will now work on +2A and +3 models. See the review for details of the fix. Also, there's been a slight tweak to the scoring system, because otherwise this game would have been simultaneously the most and least crap game so far, and when there's more than one entry, that's absurd!
  19 January 2021: Paul Equinox Collins, another CSSCGC veteran and 2002's host, has become the first entrant to tackle the Challenges - both Magenta (weird functions) and Red (YouTube channels). ASMR Eye Examination features, in his words, "the lovely Heather Feather".
  13 January 2021: Dave Hughes, veteran of past CSSCGCs and 2013's host, returns with Mr. Don't!, and in doing so, teaches some of the programmers of 38 years ago who were trying to simulate the arcade experience a thing or two. Maybe.
  1 January 2021: There has already been a first submission: Alexandre Colella's P.P.S. - Pixel Perfect Shot. I've made an extra-special effort to review it on the first day of the competition, and it is simultaneously the most and least crap game so far...!
  1 January 2021: There was a Hootenanny, and the competition has opened! You all have eleven entire months to send me your entries. Make sure I know how to use the emulator and load the game if it's a weird one (i.e. anything listed under the "????" icon below.)
  26 December 2020: The website launches! The competition opens when Jools Holland declares 2021 itself open (if indeed there is a Hootenanny this year...)